Over the Hedge

What a fun movie! It was so nice to be able to sit back and let this film wash over me. After all the terrorism, sinking ships and boring codes, it was nice to just see a simple story play out on the screen. I was a tad apprehensive at first because Over the Hedge is put out by Dreamworks Animation. In my opinion, Dreamworks will never hold a candle to the geniuses over at Pixar. You may ask, what about Shrek? Well, I was never a huge fan of Shrek, sure it was funny but the animation was always a bit more degraded than Pixar and the humour was sometimes way too adult in nature. Dreamworks then followed up Shrek with the disastrous Shark Tale and the tepid Madagascar, so my expectations were not real high. To my surprise, I had an enjoyable time watching these woodland creatures invade suburbia to look for food. Considering all the housing developments that are arising all around us, this film seems to be at the right place at the right time.

Ever since Robin Williams lent his voice to the genie in Aladdin, the cartoon industry has reveled in finding big name stars to join their cartoon creations. Some have worked great (Ray Romano as a mammoth), some not so much (Brad Pitt as Sinbad). Over the Hedge hired some great comedians to lend their distinct voices such as the depressive Gary Shandling, the neurotic Eugene Levy, the angry Wanda Sykes and the hyperactive Steve Carrell. Even William Shatner seems to have fun playing possum for his on-screen daughter played by Avril Lavigne. It’s an eclectic mix that is lead by Bruce Willis who I will always remember as the voice of Mikey in Look Who’s Talking. While I will admit that I was not a big fan of Bruce Willis’ storyline or the forgettable songs, the antics and personalities of the woodland creatures more than made up for the shortfalls. This is definitely one to rent and just enjoy.

The Da Vinci Code

Okay, so I am one of the twenty people on earth who haven’t read The Da Vinci Code. I’m not really a reader, I prefer a much more visual medium. So my opinion of this movie may be very different from someone who has actually read Dan Brown’s book. I have heard that those who read the book found the movie enjoyable because they got to see the images they had created in their head, now acted on the screen in front of them. Of course, I have a hard time believing that anyone would have imagined main character Robert Langdon looking like a greasy-long haired Tom Hanks. In any case, while the movie studios always bank on the fact that those who read the book are likely to watch the movie, they also need to make sure that the film makes sense to those who are uninformed, namely myself. Not that the film left me confused in the slightest.

If I had to describe The Da Vinci Code I would say it’s just like Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade except with 1/10 the action, 7 times the exposition and none of the light humour. Okay, so maybe it’s nothing like Indiana. Maybe the state, I haven’t really been there before. I was bored out of my tree watching this film. The only time I was on the edge of my seat was when I was drifting off, much like some sermons I heard when I was young. It could be the fact that on top of all the mind-numbing explanations, all the actors had soothing voices that are easily able to put one to sleep. I might have been more alert if Gilbert Gottfried was doing the explanations instead of Sir Ian McKellan. Not to rag on McKellan though, he was actually my favourite character in the story, but it was unfortunate that he had to explain everything to the tiniest detail. Oh, and what’s the deal with Paul Bettany as the masochist albino, did this actually help his career?

It’s not that the film was terrible, it was just wasn’t what I expected. Judging from the trailers, I was expecting some adventure, mystery and some great acting from Tom Hanks. Unfortunately, all three were disappointing. Because of the complex symbology and cryptology, it’s not like you could guess the answers yourself. I was hoping more for a whodunit. Maybe if you read the book, you have more time to work things out in your mind before turning the next page. In any case, I think this movie would probably make an okay rental, probably more so if you read the book. But enough of my exposition.

Poseidon

To start off, I’ll admit that I have not seen the original Poseidon Adventure, or read the book it was based on. All I knew going into the film is that an expensive boat sinks and that Shelly Winters did a good job in the 1972 film. I also knew that Wolfgang Peterson, who knows a little bit about making water movies like Das Boot and The Perfect Storm, directed it. I went in with low expectations, which has sometimes allowed me to be pleasantly surprised with mediocre movies. This was not one of those times. Even at a mere 100 minutes, I was praying for this film to end and put me out of this misery.

The film started promising enough with the quick introductions of our ‘heroes.’ Kurt Russell (Backdraft), Richard Dreyfuss (Jaws), Emmy Rossum (Phantom of the Opera), Mia Maestro (Alias), Freddy Rodriguez (Six Feet Under) and Kevin Dillon (Entourage). I like these people, especially the TV ones; this movie may not be mind-numbingly dull after all. Then we're introduced to Josh Lucas (Glory Road, Stealth, Hulk), who in my opinion is one of the worst actors of our generation. I don’t find him charming, intense or a believable human being. He needs to learn something called emoting. Oh yeah, we also meet the mother and son who make the dumbest choices known to man, including running off and being attracted to Josh Lucas.

Now I’m someone who is willing to suspend my disbelief when it comes to movies but I found myself marveling at the sheer idiocy and implausibility of the many heroic acts. They were diving into depths unaware of the obstacles below, they were adding more weight to an already shaky zip line and they were holding their breath a lot longer than David Blaine. The most unfortunate part for me is that they killed the jerk off near the beginning. When it comes to survival movies, what is this obsession with killing off the unlikable character so early on? Speilberg had the lawyer be the first course in Jurassic Park, and Poseidon follows suit by having the jerk be one of the first to go. Wouldn’t it have been more fun to watch the jerk, who are often the comic relief, screw everyone over only to get his comeuppance at the end of the film? I think so.

Anyway, I would say avoid this movie at all costs. I don’t think it even deserves a rental. Maybe you can watch it when it comes out on network television and yell bitingly sarcastic comments at the screen, much like Mystery Science Theatre 3000. Then at least it would be good for something.

Mission: Impossible III

It’s a shame how people can’t make the distinction between the actor and the character. The franchise took a major hit thanks to Tom Cruise’s over-exposure in the media. (Funny, when I was watching M:I III, I didn’t once think of Tom Cruise jumping on a couch or bad mouthing Brooke Shields and Matt Lauer.) Apparently, audiences let War of the Worlds slide (probably because of Speilberg), but they finally got tired of the opinionated actor and snubbed this highly enjoyable film. I feel bad for first-time film director, JJ Abrams (creator of Alias and Lost), who had to go down with his ship. I had a lot of fun watching this film and thought the franchise had been taken up a notch after the sub-par Mission: Impossible II, which was directed by slow-mo dove lover John Woo. This third installment reminded me of the fun that I had in the first outing (no pun intended) directed by Brian De Palma. I like the fact that they have gone with different directors for each film; it offers a unique perspective and a chance for experimentation.

What this third installment (as with the first one) had going for it was the race against time. Gotta love that every-second-counts, edge-of-your-seat action. You see, John Woo took his time and finally added the life or death countdown halfway through the film instead of from the start. While I would have liked to see what David Fincher (Seven and Fight Club), the initial director, would have done with Ethan Hunt, JJ Abrams came out of the gate swinging. JJ has a certain style, a certain passion that comes through in most of his work. I found M:I III to be what an episode of Alias would be like, if Abrams had an unlimited budget. It had classic Alias written all over it. Breaking into the Vatican? Check. Visit an Asian city? Check. Play around with time? Check. Work as a group instead of all alone? Check. Sprinkled in humour? Check. A role for Greg Grunberg (Sean on Felicity, Weiss on Alias, Pilot on Lost)? Check. And if you love JJ Abrams’ work like I do, I guarantee you will enjoy this film. It’s fast paced, action-packed and even has a plot. And with Phillip Seymour Hoffman, fresh off his Oscar win, as the newest baddie, you’ve got all the makings of a fine action flick. What a way to start off the summer! If only more people gave it a chance.

The Best So Far

I’m going to forgo the best movies of all time for now and get into the movies that were released so far this summer. Once I catch up, then I’ll take the time and narrow down the best of the best. Before I get to the summer ‘blockbusters’ maybe I should tell you about the best movies that were released so far this year (before the summer season) :
1. Thank You For Smoking
2. United 93
3. Lucky Number Slevin
4. V for Vendetta
5. Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
Want some justification?

Thank You for Smoking – Aaron Eckhart is one slick guy. I have never smoked a cigarette in my life, but this guy could sure convince me otherwise. This is the true definition of pitch black comedy. It is both intelligent and funny and even has a moralistic message. The cast works well together with some fun cameos by Rob Lowe and Adam Brody. At 1 hour and 32 minutes it is also shrewdly quick and doesn’t overstay its welcome like many comedies today. It was a limited release movie but definitely deserves a look on DVD.

United 93 – Going in I thought the film would be manipulative and accusatory but was pleasantly shocked to find it was anything but. The passengers are given no back story, the terrorists are real people and not the stereotypical movie bad guy, the cast is virtually unknown, the plot unravels in real time, and some of the military people play themselves to show the accuracy of the situation. I remember sitting at home watching the towers fall and not giving as much thought to this doomed flight that crashed in Pennsylvania. My one complaint is that all the passengers are nice to the flight attendants, not one jerk among them. C’mon there’s always a jerk on the plane. But I can see why they didn’t take this route. This is a respectful and important film, if you can stomach it, you should see it.

Lucky Number Slevin – Talk about slick. A fun story told from various perspectives and played by actors who are clearly having a fun time engaging in the punchy dialogue. If you don’t like the actors, the plot, the dialogue, the action, or the ending, you can at least take time to appreciate the set direction and its bizarre sense of style when it comes to wallpaper and floor design.

V for Vendetta – I’ll admit my expectations were high. It’s the Matrix guys for Pete’s sake. It also has Natalie Portman, who I’ve had a crush on since her amazing role in Zach Braff’s Garden State. V was very stylish and well done but I was hoping for a bit more humour and a better ending than the one ruined by advertisements for the movie. But it’s still some great fun and it’s nice to see Hugo Weaving again, even if it’s behind a mask.

Ice Age 2: The Meltdown – The first Ice Age is better but this one was surprisingly good. I went in with low expectations and came out enjoying my time. Scrat is even better in this movie because they were able to plan a bit more in advance. (Scrat was inserted into the movie last time due to the overwhelming response to the teaser trailer) Ray Romano is great again, as is John Leguizamo who gets a little too much screen time this time around and unfortunately, Dennis Leary’s Diego is stuck with a crappy storyline. At least there are some funny possums to pick up the slack.

Best TV of All Time

Before I start my diatribes on the movies and television shows I've been watching, I thought I should let you, the gentle reader, know what I think is the best out there. I feel it's important to have that frame of reference. Now usually I will put my favourites into top 10 lists but the subject of 'all-time' seems to broad to narrow down. The best TV shows comes a lot more naturally to me than movies, so I'm going to start there.

Best TV Shows of All Time (in no particular order)

Sitcoms: Simpsons, Cheers, Seinfeld, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Friends, Scrubs, Arrested Development, Entourage, Fawlty Towers and The Office (BBC and American version).

Dramas: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Serenity, Lost, Veronica Mars, Sopranos, 24 and Alias.

Other Shows: Amazing Race, Chappelle's Show, Robot Chicken, and The Daily Show.

Now you may be saying, "What about The West Wing?" Well, you may be surprised but I haven't seen every show that is on the air. I never got into The West Wing. I'm a little scared of fast-talking American politics, and I feel stupider watching it. (If I want American politics, I'll watch some Daily Show to get my fix.) While I realize that Aaron Sorkin (creator of West Wing) is a genius when it comes to the walk and talk dialogue, I already got my chance to see his work get pioneered in his short-lived wonderfully made drama/comedy called Sports Night which aired a couple of years before West Wing. And I'll definitely catch more of his work this fall with Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip starring Matthew Perry and Bradley Whitford. So I don't feel like I'm missing out that much. If you want to challenge my list and ask why certain shows are missing or why I have a show so absurdly titled as Buffy the Vampire Slayer on my list, feel free to comment. I'm ready to defend my choices. Bring it on.

Virgin Territory

This is my first blogging experience. Please be gentle. (I may cry)

So why am I writing a blog? Could it be because I want to share my views with the world? Not really. I only want to share my views with a couple of people and I'm trying to avoid that ear cancer I'll inevitably get from my cell phone. Could it be because I am loaded with time and thought I'd take up journaling? That couldn't be further from the truth. There's too much stuff to watch out there and I think journaling is kind of sissy. Then why, oh why, would I start a time consuming, opinion sharing, sissy-boy blog? Well, the long and short of it is, a guy named Joel Wright asked me to. So here I am.

Joel is a colleague of mine and wanted to get my opinion on some of the movies currently gracing the big screen. We would talk at lunch or in the hallway and discuss the various films that we had seen. Then he suggested that I write a blog so he could get my opinions online. He suggested this many, many times. Maybe he didn't have the time to talk to me during the workday, maybe he prefers to laugh at my spelling and grammar skills, maybe he didn't appreciate the smell of the Maple and Brown Sugar Quaker Oatmeal on my breath, or maybe he thought my insights were so profound that he must find a way to harness my pop culture intellect so he can treasure it forevermore. It could be any number of reasons. So I thought why not.

So what I'm going to do in this blog space is talk about movies and television. I'll talk about the movies I've just seen and I'll tell you what TV shows you should be watching. I'll warn you that I'm pretty desensitized and I'll watch an amazing amount of shit. (Oh yeah, my parents are Dutch, so I'll probably use the word "shit" a lot.) So if my two cents means anything to you, stick around and I'll try and open your world to an amazing array of pop culture that will both astound and disgust you. You've been warned.